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The Paul Mach Blog - Honey, just ONE more Wheelset, I Promise
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Living life on the edge... of the road

Honey, just ONE more Wheelset, I Promise
Thursday, June 19, 2008 - Race Reports
You know, bike racing is alot like gambling. It starts with just 30 bucks to Velo Promo every other weekend. Then you win a free t-shirt and you're hooked. You start shoving all your extra money into it hoping to win big. Then it consumes your life. Before you know it, all your friends are bike racers and all you talk about is that last night of racing. Wait, should I be worried?

Anyway, the first stage of Tour de Nez was yesterday at the Grand Sierra Resort in Reno. I'm racing with ZteaM's Christian Kearney and Chris Swan for this one. The stage was just a simple crit in the parking lot of the casino. It did have a nice 180 in it, but other than that, it was pretty typical.

As usual, I started out at the back. I moved up a little bit and spent most of the race in the middle. With about 20 minutes to go the pace picked up and the whole field was strung out. I struggled to close some gaps, but I managed to stay in the main group and placed 34th.

What makes me the most excited is that I beat the Jesse Moore (39th). I'm now 4 for 4. It doesn't matter that he crashed a couple times. I figured he was a little frustrated, but then I noticed him softly singing these words to the tune of I Kissed a Girl by Katy Perry.

I kissed the dirt and I liked it
The taste of the Reno street grit
I kissed the dirt just to try it
I hope my team mates don't mind it
It hurt real bad
It dinged my bike
Still means I'll be sore tonight
I kissed the dirt and I liked it
I liked it

I think he'll be okay.

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Thursday, June 19, 2008, 12:50 pm
knock on wood!

La-Zee RHY-mur
Thursday, June 19, 2008, 11:09 pm
Still sucking, I see. You are pathetic. Can't win anything. "I beat someone that came in at 39th, whoopie!". What sing were you singing at 34th?

I kissed a SUCK and I liked it!
The taste of the Reno street SUCKs cause I suck
I kissed the SUCK just to try it
I hope my team mates don't mind it but they say I suck
It hurt real bad
It dinged my ding-dong
Still means I'll SUCK tonight
I kissed the SUCK and I liked it
I liked it (sucking that is)

I heard you like to strut your stuff at the DBC Race Ride on a weekly basis. I dare you to come this week or anytime soon. I'll make a special trip just to come over to Davis and show you how to race! You can't come close to my ability! I'll see your sorry ass on Tuesday, Paulsucks.com!

If you don't show I'll know for certain that you're a wimp and can't take on anyone of substance. Just show up, I dare you! But I know you won't be there next week. I bet you don't show for a month you wus! You'll probably just have your other DBC henchmen fight your wars. They wanted to after my first comment, anyway. But you won't show, I'm positive. You're probably just scared of what I'd do.


ps- and your rhyming sucks. learn something from what I've shown. I'm the RHY-mur!!!!

Friday, June 20, 2008, 9:21 am
I'm the hiphopapotamus
My lyrics are bottomless...

You need to watch some Flight of the Conchords (FOTC for those in the know) and incorporate that into your blog

BTW, still .8sec ahead of you. Thank you Christian. Just remember, if I am sitting right behind you in the race, I am actually .8sec ahead of you. You might as well just quit now

Friday, June 20, 2008, 6:05 pm
Just remember now, if I am ahead of you tomorrow, I am actually like 20 minutes behind you.

Friday, June 20, 2008, 8:51 pm
We still love you Paul even if you can't, uh, rhyme as well as Lay-ZEE Rhy-mur. Guess everybody has to have one thing they are good at. That dude is boss at making up SUCKY rhymes. And all poetic like. But I heard he got dropped on the last Saturday's coffee-and-a-roll ride. c'iest la vie